Questions that will get her interested in you, while allowing you to decide if you are interested in her.
Questions that avoid the conversational boxes that turn a fun opportunity into a dull exchange.
Too many guys ask girls questions that are either too boring (“Come here often? ”), too silly (“If you could be a flavor of Kool-Aid, what flavor would you be?
”) or too much like a job interview (“What do you want to be doing in five years? What you need aren’t just questions, but good questions.
I wish I’d had access to something like this years ago. It would really help to personalize the search, to ask the questions that we think are important. So, given that there is a real live vehicle for Catholic Match members to personalize their interviews, I sent a note out to my friends. a) talk through an idea or problem and come to a resolution, b) the detox you do in hot yoga after a night of whiskey and cigars, or c) when you call credit counselor to readjust your loan? If I had just met you, and I were to tell you that I’m flying across the country the next day, would you a) tell me to have a nice trip, or b) follow me on the next flight and book a room in the same hotel?
Let’s be deliberate about which questions we ask and the answers we offer.
More than that, you need to know what makes a question good, so you can come up with your own questions spontaneously, effectively, in the moment.
Questions that give you meaningful information, show genuine interest, and allow you to be authentic and open.
I had answers to my multiple-choice questions — how would you describe your family, what’s your worst habit — but then what?
Rarely did men do anything beyond taking my interview. It wasn’t working for me and I considered eliminating it altogether. In surveying several members about why they do not have a personal interview in their profile, I found the most common answers were “I’m too lazy to make one” and “It’s a waste of time because it doesn’t yield anything.” They echoed my recent thoughts about the interview.